The Stoke Family

There’s definitely something going on: it seems like it’s the biggest big week in the history of big weeks; the texts are flying in and by the end of it I will have spoken to everyone I know and everyone I don’t know too. This is us three kids. We don’t often get together because we live, from left to right, in Spain, Jamaica, in fey Norwich and in ‘Stoke-by-the-Sea’ ie Hartlepool. Yesterday we were in the garden with Mum, below, who is doing ‘as well as can be expected, duck’. Bumble (Spain, Jamaica), had bought her this new Stoke shirt seventeen sizes too big for a tenner with a special message on the back which he considered to be amusing and which I might put up later and then again I might not because he’s actually not as funny as he likes to think he is and though he may look quite interesting and a tuff gong he actually speaks a bit like Mr Bean and talks mainly about carpentry or, failing that, fishing. He likes rugby, not football. Diane (Stoke-by-the-Sea) is the talented one and is a proper artist.

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19 Responses to The Stoke Family

  1. mum says:

    it,s the boring fella hyjaking mum,s compoota ,she,s nodding off watching corrie !! thanks for the analasis , i quite like it,i had to sand the top edge of that bit of trim we added to the lower edge of the far side of the dekking area earlier today. although the access was straight forward enough,where the narrower surface(the horizontal) met the thicker upright section,i had to form a very straight edged doubled over piece of 120 grit to get right into the grove that had been formed by the afore mentioned trim. but i,m happy to report that once the outdoor wood treatment/stain had been carefully applied (with a 1 1/4 in horse hair brush)it was ,for my dinero,what can only be described as an invisible addition to what was,an already excellent piece of outdoor dekking .. i,m just off to the tackle shop,so i,ll give you a summary of what i brought as soon as i get back. it was lovely to see you, and i will have a few free days to help with your spare room skirtingboard after the 4th of next month as agreed. hope this message finds you both well. lots of love andrew.xx.
    p.s. the barber can fit me in next thursday (thank f x x k) XXXXXXXXXXXX

  2. Daftburger says:

    What’s David Bowie doing there?

  3. OS says:

    PMSL @ Bumble Marciano.

    For God’s sake, Dianne, straighten your tits out lass! You’ve let my fantasies down big style there!

    Hiya Mum. *waves handy across the ethernet*

  4. Stephen Foster says:

    Possibility you’ll get in trouble there OS.

  5. Stephen Foster says:

    That’s the first time I’ve even seen you do irony our kid. You are coming on 45º from a straight edge.

    Now, for God’s sake can I advise you that this > ‘ is an apostrophe and goes in where a letter is missing, or letters are missing, as in isn’t (is not), and that this >, is a comma and goes in where there’s a pause, like.

    The other use of an apostrophe is what we call possessive, when one thing belongs to another as in ‘the sake of God,’ – God’s sake, as above.

  6. mum says:

    wheres t hat o n ThE coMpooter ?? 1234567890.,/?¬:;” |(i genuinely ca,n,t find it !!)

  7. mum says:

    p.s. bet you dont know how to set up a bolt rig !!!!

  8. Stephen Foster says:

    Two buttons to the right of the L, after the one with the semicolon >; used for a pause in a sentence which is more than a comma but less than a full stop, where both parts of the sentence are related. The shift key on that gives you the colon: used to introduce either a pertinent point or a list; the component parts of a list may be separated by either commas or semicolons depending. So the apostrophe is the normal stroke (non-shift) on the next key along, the one which has the old fashioned double “in speech marks” on the shift.

    You are right about that rig thing.

  9. OS says:

    I’m like Bumble Marciano. ‘Trouble’ is my middle name. Anyway, I like fiesty wimmen who have a go at me. It adds to the thrill of the chase. I can just see her spittin’ feathers while she’s juggling them boobs into place. 🙂

    I may be one of the very few people who like Bumble Marciano’s hair, too. The boy has a certain two-finger attitude that I admire.

  10. Stephen Foster says:

    You got him right there OS, he flicks the Vs more often than Rooney.

    Everybody loves his hair; me don’t wat you is on about me bredren.

  11. markelt says:


  12. mum says:

    ~##@””” ‘ ‘ close …. @~:’++## i think its mum~ compoota s innit ,, ……… anyway … about the irony stuff ??? you last scribble was realy interesting.. and old stokey rules XXXX

  13. OS says:

    Loadsa kisses, Mum. You’re still a sweet chick, and you look great. 😉

  14. markelt says:

    The last time I saw anybody behave like this was The Place in 1984.

  15. stephen foster says:


    Sammy Belles

    1984? You really shouldn’t lie about ur age Elt

  16. mum says:

    easy os that was still off to catch a plane now !!! see y,all on the rebound . XX

  17. Stephen Foster says:

    Credit where it’s due youth, you’re the first person that’s ever fluked a Bold Code into the comments : )

    Safe journey you two xxx

  18. OS says:

    Safe journey, Mum. ‘Av a good time.


  19. bumble says:

    back safe n sound , great to see ya (how did you know it was a fluke) i didn.t even know it was a fluke !!?? see you next time i hope XXXXXXXXXXXXX.

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